I am STILL a dirty old woman…

It’s Zeb’s fault.  David’s friend Zeb, who posted to Facebook about someone wearing a vintage Hanson t-shirt.  I’m thinking:  “VINTAGE HANSON?  How old does that make ME??”  But next thing you know, I’m googling Hanson to get my timeline right – it can’t be 20 years ago and it’s got to be at least 20 years before something qualifies as vintage, doesn’t it?  I refrain from watching MmmBop – I don’t want to head into Skanky Cougar land right away.  No it ISN’T 20 years – a mere 15 since 1997, when MmmBop hit the charts.  I find out that they are still together – still performing and, more importantly for my purposes, are now ADULTS. 

Isaac, Taylor and Zac Hanson circa 2012

Which makes me feel so much better, because I lusted after Taylor Hanson when he was 14 freaking years old.  Which wouldn’t have been bad except for the fact that I was… let me do the math here, oh good God!  I was 29 years old.  He was skinny, he was blond, he could sing.  And boy, did I have a thing for skinny, blond, artistic types.  (actor Leonardo DiCaprio, skater  Ilia Kulik, any random blond, skinny, teenager busking near me) If I couldn’t lift them over my head, or at least carry them under one arm like a clutch purse, what was the point of the crush??

I wasn’t going to look at the old videos ’cause that’s just SO wrong on SO many levels.  Until I realized that while I shouldn’t be watching those videos, my 12 year old daughter Rissa could TOTALLY watch the videos with pre-teen immunity!!!

“Rissa, come here!  I’ve got something to show you!!!”  I drag her to the tablet and load up MmmBop.

First thing she says, “Are those guys or girls?  ‘Cause they kind of all look like girls.”  I guess long hair for boys isn’t the style in 2012.  But she totally dug their music.  “This is WAY better than One Direction!”

So, Taylor’s the one on the left,  NOT the one in the middle – I am not THAT much of a perv.

It all came rushing back.  Just looking at the photo now makes me blush.  I am quickly writing the next paragraph before I get arrested for impure thoughts!

In my ‘research’  (wink-wink-nudge-nudge),  I found out that they’re still making music, still touring, still gaining fans.  In fact, they are going to be in Peterborough, ON August 25, 2012 – on the same freaking night that my rock opera has its showcase presentation in Toronto.  (I raise an arm to the Heavens and yell “WHY, GOD?!? WHY?!?“)  But what’s really cool?  It appears that these guys have a sense of humour and are just generally good people.  Check out the video for Thinking ‘Bout Somethin’ that they made in 2010, where they riff on Ray Charles’ scene from The Blues Brothers…

AND … but wait there’s MORE!!! Last year a dude started a video blog campaign to have Hanson play at his wedding.   He made hundreds of video pleas to Hanson.  He was DETERMINED.  After 458 videos this is what Hanson did in return:

I know, right?  Not able to make the wedding, they offer to play the HONEYMOON?!?!?  So they’re NICE, too??  And now, I’m pretty much convinced that Taylor Hanson would be the perfect artist to play the lead vampire, Aethan, in my rock opera.  You know, when we hit Broadway next year…  Just as a reminder, scroll back to the top of the blog and look at him – he’s the one in the middle.  Just imagine HIM, in an Armani Suit – preying upon the female form…  I might need a second.   A girl’s gotta dream.  And now that HE’S 29, I wouldn’t even get arrested!