Doesn’t that jiggle when you run?
I said to David, as I watched him in the bathroom this morning. He was in his boxer shorts, shaving in the other mirror, and it struck me how loose they were and that they wouldn’t give a guy ANY support for his manly bits. That’s why I asked.
He looked at me, confused for a second. I made a downward glance. “You know. Your penis. Does it hurt when you run without a jockstrap?”
That’s when Rissa walked in to the bathroom. She rolled her eyes at us, said “PARENTS!” deposited her toothbrush back in the toothbrush glass and then left.
David and I shared a glance. “I think that was a flounce,” said David. “I think you’re right,” said I.
David continued shaving.
“Seriously,” I said. “Isn’t it uncomfortable?”
David shrugged. “Not really. You kind of get used to it. When you’re wearing shorts, you can kind of tuck it.”
“Tuck it?!?” I’m trying to figure out the logistics of that.
“You know, if the shorts are tight enough,” he says.
I continued looking at how baggy the boxers were. It just didn’t seem right to me. Then I looked down at my own boobs and did a size comparison.
“Oh, I get it!! Your penis is nowhere close to the size of my boobs and it’s lower to the ground.”
“Huh?” He looked a little insulted.
“Your regular, every day penis, when it’s not, excited – not as much extra flesh to bob around, as say,” I grab my boobs, “THESE.”
When in doubt, if you’ve wounded a man’s ego – distract him with breasts.