6 inches to sleep on…
“Do you have that little carpenter’s level handy?” I ask.
David looks over at me from his side of the bed.
“Because why?”
“Because I’m feeling pretty askew here,” I say looking down
at my torso. My boobs are doing a great
impersonation of a ship in distress – listing to the west. “We have a divot in the bed.”
at my torso. My boobs are doing a great
impersonation of a ship in distress – listing to the west. “We have a divot in the bed.”
“I think you mean valley.
I don’t think there’s any sod that needs to be replaced from a bad golf
swing.”
I don’t think there’s any sod that needs to be replaced from a bad golf
swing.”
“Valley then. Our bed
has a valley. See?” I prop myself up on my side and
immediately roll to the middle of the bed.
“It’s fine when I’m flat on my back, my tatas are equalized, but if I try to go on my
side…” I demonstrate a second time,
rolling into David.
has a valley. See?” I prop myself up on my side and
immediately roll to the middle of the bed.
“It’s fine when I’m flat on my back, my tatas are equalized, but if I try to go on my
side…” I demonstrate a second time,
rolling into David.
“That’s why,” he says – a light dawning.
“That is why, by the end of the night, I wind up with 6 inches to sleep
on.”
“That is why, by the end of the night, I wind up with 6 inches to sleep
on.”
“That’s what she said.”
“BAH!”
“I’m not doing it on purpose,” I say. “Divot.”
“Valley.”
“Whatever.”
