Who let the dwarves into my uterus?!?
WARNING: There will be foul language in this post.
MOTHERFUCKING DWARVES.* I’m sorry, but… REALLY… REALLY?!? I’m sure that the lining of my uterus is chock-a-block with rich mineral deposits which can be sold at a premium on the Disc World, but I would just like to state for the record that I did NOT give my permission for a team of mining dwarves to bring their motherfucking pick axes into my uterus to collect its bounty.
At the very least, the little rat bastards could give me a cut. If the (WARNING: TMI) 2 and a half inch blood clot, which they apparently spent the entire night chipping away, is worth so fucking much – I deserve at least 75% of the take when they sell that fucker to the black market.
I am sure that peri-menopausal blood clots hold a certain cachet – maybe the sick twisted pricks who buy them from the motherfucking dwarves eat them à la placenta ingestion… I don’t give a cat’s fragrant ass who is doing what with them, I just want my fucking cut.
There are a lot of us out there gals – if we unionize, I’m sure that we can negotiate a more than fair business contract.
2, 4, 6, 8 – OUR FEMALE BITS AREN’T YOURS TO TAKE!
WHAT DO WE WANT? COMPENSATION!!
WHEN DO WE WANT IT? WE’LL FUCKING DECAPITATE YOU!!
*I choose to go the Tolkien route – not the Disney route