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| It’s not just me, right? |
Other works in this series include:
The counter above the dishwasher is NOT the dishwasher!
and
The plan had been to wash my hair in the bathtub. My scalp just couldn’t take any more, I would lose my mind if I didn’t shampoo. It’d had been three days since the shower curtain had been taken down to make way for the skim coat of drywall compound. Problem was, the week was…
“You’ve what?” asks Rissa, slightly laggy on her end of the video call. “Who have you been talking to? What did you do?” “Nothing,” I say. “I think it’s just my age.” “It’s what? What do you mean it’s your age?” “I think you just get to a certain age and…” “You think there are…
WARNING: ADULT CONTENT Cutie Pie Wax Bar – Vancouver’s Waxing Destination vajazzle Pronunciation: /vəˈdʒaz(ə)l/ –vajazzle, v.: adorn the pubic area (of a woman) with crystals, glitter, or other decoration. Okay, have I been living under a rock? How did I not know about this? My friend Narda read it in a pulp fiction book and…
WARNING: There are inferred epithets in this post. “HOLY $*&! MOTHER – &@%!%# JESUS! “ After dinner, on the nights when we’re not over-programmed to the nth degree – David likes to change into his pj pants and a nice warm sweater. We’ll snuggle in on the family room sofa and he’ll either read or…
I will be unstable for the next 7.5 weeks. I give you all fair warning. Do NOT tease me. Not now. In fact, do not tease me for the next 7.5 weeks. Treat the next 7.5 weeks as if I am hormonally unbalanced. I am very fragile. It ain’t hormones – it’s house. We…
I’d been holding back the hypervintilation for most of the morning. I’d stepped over and around things – did the Stanley meeting Livingstone in my bedroom as I finally located a pair of tights, pried open the vanity drawer that didn’t have its handle, because it STILL needs another coat of paint before the handle…