WARNING: REAL LIFE IS DISCUSSED In 1979, my mother attended a parent council meeting in Kingston, Nova Scotia. The topic: SEX EDUCATION. (Gasp!) The community was up in arms – what were they going to be teaching our kids?? If you teach kids about sex, all they’ll want to do is try it for themselves!!…
Rissa may look like me, but she gets her perfectionist streak from David. David comes from a long line of perfectionists. On his worst days, David will despair, “I’m not good at anything!!!” David is on crack when he says this. “I’m a Jack of all trades and master of none,” he huffs. “Okay, first…
The most recent live-action retelling of Cinderella allows the viewer to get as up close and personal with red carpet style as one can get without attending the Oscars or Golden Globes. I watched most of the movie with my mouth slightly open… it was Canada Day with silk and taffeta fireworks. I’ve been…
Self-control, why hast thou forsaken me? I know that I shouldn’t eat this shit. I know that. I’m a grown up, I’ve lived with my body for long enough to understand how it works. So….. WHY CAN’T I STOP MYSELF?? I’m going to hell. It’s the freaking holiday season, sending…
I’ve got a job for all the socially-conscious hacktivists out there. Join together you cyber Robin Hoods – join forces and find the anonymous trolls who spread their bile throughout the Interwebs. Identify these trolls, procure evidence of their gross violations of common civility and then give transcripts of those violations to the trolls’ Grandmothers….
What 80s movie are you? What’s your old person’s name? Which Dwarf are you? What breed of dog? What Harry Potter Character? What ice cream flavour? What Shakespearean heroine? What turn of the century inventor? What Norse God? What Titan? What Dr. Seuss book? What Mathematical Equation? What Scrabble letter? Okay, I admit it –…
It was my favourite day. MOVIE BINGE DAY. It’s right up there with Christmas Holidays with family and Front Row tickets to Violent Femmes. MOVIE BINGE DAY has to include at least three, if not four movies. (Just seeing two isn’t nearly decadent enough.) David’s even created an app so that you can plan your…
It’s a vagina. Say it with me folks. VA-GI-NA. Vagina. Half the people in the world have them. You might have your very own. Check now. If it’s an ‘INNY” it’s a vagina. If it’s an “OUTY” it’s a penis. That’s not to say that, as an adult, I haven’t used comic euphimisms to get…
“Don’t crash while I’m doing this,” I say as I unbuckle my seat belt. “O….kay,” says David – eyes now glued to the road in front of him. His peripherals have extended to a 6 foot radius around the car. We’re on our way to the airport. Rissa is travelling to Vancouver. BY HERSELF. At…
When I look at Rissa now, I can’t remember her as a toddler. Even when I see photos of her from that time, it’s like I’m looking at somebody else’s kid. I know that she was this small elfin child, but that child bears next to no resemblance to the tall, poised 14 year…