WARNING: Adult matters discussed in this post Let it be proclaimed from the mountain tops: I have the best spouse and daughter in the world. For Mothers’ Day this year they gifted me a spa afternoon (with light lunch). Four treatments in 4 hours: a facial, massage, pedicure and manicure – all in the delightful…
We’ve been watching Pushing Daisies again. We watched it when it was on Network television in 2007-2009 – loved it so much that we bought the boxed set. Recently we introduced Rissa to it. It has become one of Rissa’s favourite things ever… “That, and Sherlock… ” Rissa quickly amends. “Every time the theme song…
I’m needing some lift and separation folks. What with my apparently swelling mammary glands – I’m finding that my standard bras don’t seem to be doing the shaping that they ought. The cups are a little wonky, the band is stretched… I can’t remember the last time I bought a real bra. You know, a…
Breasts. Oh, the breasts on Game of Thrones… They are everywhere. You can’t possibly miss them. People have been making graphs about the boobs per episode in the show. They are the pertest, highest, smallest areola’d breasts I’ve ever seen. The Red Priestess Melisandre? SPOILER ALERT Has areolas the size of dimes. I mean sure,…
I had a sneezing fit at the office. When the sneezes hit, I held onto my desk and clamped my knees together as if the freedom of the Western world depended on it. I hadn’t needed to go to the bathroom before that moment, but after the 5 sneezes, it seemed like it would be…
“Have you decided what colour you’d like for your nails?” The esthetician points with her chin over to the selection of nail polishes on the counter as she massaged my calves. I pick up the nail wheels, vacillating between the reds and the pinks. Seduce Him (although that should really be Seduce Him/Her – I…
We are all just part of the Matrix folks. We are all just cogs in a wheel… frickin’ useless, tech-reliant, cogs in the wheel of the Internet. Come the Apocalypse, we are totally fucked. We were completely cut off Sunday night. We lost all knowledge, all connection, all ability to interact with humanity. Our modem…
“Hey look at this!” says Rissa. She’s just received her “prize” pack for selling a shit-load of magazines subscriptions for her school fund raiser. They give the kids a bag chock full of items they must get in bulk from higher end dollar stores. They’re all pretty much craptastic, but it is, after all, a…
Is one of the by-products of peri-menopause bigger boobs? Because I’m pretty sure that my boobs are growing. Swear to God. I feel like I have pregnant boobs. I’m ALL boobs. I look in the mirror and they’re just… there… I mean really, there. Like KAPOW there!! I walk into the room and they…
“The treadmill is trying to kill me!” “Kill you?” David asks skeptically. “Well, it’s, at the very least, trying to Gaslight me.” “And it’s doing this, how??” “Because I can’t load Netflix.” David gives me the eyebrow equivalent to a face palm. “And this is driving you mad?” “Yes. Yes, it is driving me mad.”…