Accept no substitutes
“Wow. You are next level with your Connery devotion.”
-
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I think I broke him
He seems like he might be in a fugue state…
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You’ll let me know when I’m elderly, right?
“Do you, or do you not, implement fall prevention measures?”
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My delicate frickin’ flower
“I’m telling you Rissa, when you’re middle-aged, your vulva gets sassy.”
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DIY Nip/Tuck
David and Rissa say that I am not allowed to take up DIY cosmetic surgery…
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I’m not 20 any more.
My mouth drops open to gather more oxygen as I attempt to move my leg…
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This isn’t the virus you’re looking for.
…given the current reality, you get those random thoughts…
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TUNA! TUNA! TUNA!!
“Are you ready for lunch?” asks Rissa.
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TASSEL TWIRLING 101
Shopping for that first training bra at The Met in 1978…
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Because a cat’s the only cat who knows where it’s at.
“Did I just lose a beauty pageant to a cat?” queries David from the living room…
