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My get up and go has f@¢#ed off… how do women survive middle-age?

On the plus side?  I’m 46 years old and still alive.   If this were the Middle Ages, I’d be dead already, or close to dead, or, at the very least, a great-Grandma, with incredibly saggy boobs because they didn’t have proper brassieres back then. On the minus side?  The part of my brain that is…

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Why yes, this IS what middle-aged hair looks like…

“Heather, what do you want for… HOLY CRAP!!!” says David as he sticks his head behind the shower curtain.  He’s reacting to the shower wall, upon which I have left all the ‘extra’ hair from my head.  And by ‘extra’ hair, I mean the hair that I regularly lose when I wash my hair.  “Are…

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It all comes down to chicken vaginas…

“So what did you do in school today?” “We had a work period in English.” “Journal entries for your ISU?” “Yep.” “Oh, and in Geography we got to watch a video.” “What kind of video?” “A video about sewers.  It’s called Crap Shoot.” “Seriously?”  I burst into laughter.  “Madame showed you a video about sewers…

And THAT is how Peri Menopause makes you healthier…

Blergh. “You okay?” I don’t even want to admit what I’ve done.  “Fine.  I’m fine.” David’s eyebrows raise. I’m sitting on the sofa in our petite grande room.  I have a Rusty Nail in one hand and cheap-ass Christmas romance collection in the other. “I might have eaten bad things,” I mumble. “Pardon me?” “grumble……

I dub thee…

David has been wanting to upgrade my computer for the past two years.  About a month ago, I finally capitulated. “All right.” “All right?” “Start the search.” “The search for…? “A new computer.” “REALLY!?!” “Really.” I couldn’t take the endless UNRESPONSIVE SCRIPT warnings and time lags – which is hilarious, because anyone in their 40s…